In The Dreamtime With Diana & Freddie

The Hollywood actress Shelley Winters was once lunching with an actress pal who wanted to pick her brains- she was penning her autobiography and was worried that she had led a fairly tame love life. "I 've had few affairs with stars" she said.
Winter's responded :"look, if they are gay or dead, just say you screwed them. None will complain"
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The Shuttle's eye was drawn to a tale that swept the world yesterday. No-one yet has clocked it as an April Fool's Joke. Such fine publications as the Sydney Morning Herald and the Daily Telegraph have faithfully repeated the tale verbatim.
Cleo Rocos who worked with the late British DJ Kenny Everett says that one night in 1988, she, Kenny and the late Freddie Mercury dressed Princess Diana in military jacket and sun shades and they all went of to the South London gay pub the Vauxhall Tavern where Diana was able to buy drinks with nary a punter spotting that the Most Famous Woman On The Planet was in their midst :
“When we walked in . . . we felt she was obviously Princess Diana and would be discovered at any minute. But people just seemed to blank her. The venue was packed, but the presence of Mercury, Everett and Rocos helped divert attention and Diana was able to order drinks at the bar before the group left,"
Such a  sweet tale from Cleo's new tome : ' The Power of Positive Drinking".

In 1996 the Shuttle spent a few days with Diana on her last trip to Australia for the Victor Chang Institute, accompanying her to various events to document the visit, commissioned by her Aussie pal Marie Sutton who had talked Diana into her last charity event before retiring from public life.

One night we were smuggled out of the Ritz Carlton Hotel in Double Bay, all 3 of us crouched in the back seat of a car, to avoid the press. Diana was visiting the St Vincent's Hospice to meet HIV patients. We were sworn to secrecy. She wanted no publicity. Diana sat and chatted to patients for over 5 hours. We took snaps of each patient with Diana as memento's.

Marie Sutton

Driving back to the Ritz Carlton the driver took us via Oxford Street to show Diana the Golden Mile of gay clubs. Diana commented that she visited gay AIDS patients around the world but had never been to a gay bar. Whilst she was still a Royal she said "my detectives would have never let me enter one without it being searched for days beforehand. In fact going to any bar was out of the question".
Freddie Mercury died in 1991 from AIDS. From about 1987 he had become a recluse and was never seen again in public again . Kenny Everett was a regular at the Vauxhall Tavern but usually went unnoticed mainly as all the patrons more or less looked just like him. It was 'clones' pub.

Diana was finally divorced from Prince Charles in 1996 and lost her Royal title and the privileges that came with it including 2 permanent detectives from the Royal Protection Squad - the ones who "would have never let me enter one (gay bar) ".  In the year leading up to her Australian visit she spoke to Marie Sutton almost daily. She would relate the extraordinary lengths she would go to meet her lovers- the private houses of the Aristocracy where she could arrange a discreet visit for a weekend  in privacy which she knew the Protection Squad would always vet. Perhaps they slipped up in the Vauxhall Tavern incident.
What a shame Diana's great pal Sir Elton John hadn't joined this little pub crawl to confirm the tale.

Looking At Jedward's Crotch(s)

Who could forget their appearances on Britain's Got Talent, as much as we tried. The god awful Jedward, John and Edward the Irish twins who sang out of tune, danced awkwardly like marionettes and basically were just plain bad.

They've had the last laugh of course and have gone on to make millions with the help of Louis Walsh who recognises a money spinner when he sees two. And they really are quite likable in a cringe worthy way.

Now pop impresario Simon Napier-Bell has weighed into the debate with a look at Jedward's trousers, on the outside but with a few comments on what may lay within.

Napier-Bell  has launched many show biz acts in his day including some who have gone on to become legends. Like Marc Bolan and T-Rex and Wham with superstar George Michael.

He also wrote a few songs-one You Don't Have To Say You Love Me was a mega hit for Dusty Springfield and Elvis Presley and which along with Big Spender is still a favourite of drag queens the world over (Napier Bell grumbles that he never receives royalties from the drag acts)

His piece on Jedward is for the  Huffington Post and he descibes them as like "asexual Teddy bears"and gives us an amazing insight into acceptable trouser crotch levels and heights as seen in the world of rock and pop. Not unlike Vogue's Anna Wintour issuing a decree on hem levels. It should  become required reading for anyone intent on cracking Britain's Got Talent or X Factor and as Napier-Bell is in constant demand to judge pop talent quests around the world he probably knows what he is talking about.

Regular Shuttle readers may re-call we acted as a bit of a host when Simon Napier Bell visited Sydney in 2009 and ferried him to and fro to various media interviews.

Simon Napier-Bell

 One, with top TV daytime host Kerri Anne Kennerley left her reeling when she asked him what was  most outrageous thing that happened in the world of rock management and he replied-"possibly when David Bowie said he would let me  f*ck him if I would manage him". Fortunately for Napier Bell he didn't take Bowie up on the offer particularly as at the time the Thin White Duke was notable for his rotting green teeth.

Napier-Bell spends most of time commuting between a sumptuous villa in Thailand and the UK and USA where he hosts a radio show and lectures while writing some best selling books in his spare time.

KAK- shocked

His Black Vinyl White Powder is considered the definitive history of rock and pop from the 60s to the 90's and was required reading on the British school curriculum.

I'm Coming To Take You To Lunch is a rollicking read about his adventures as he attempts to (successfully) negotiate with Chinese party officials to have Wham as the first ever international pop act to appear in China, nipping in the bud the ambitions of Freddie Mercury and Queen. At the time it was one of the most talked about events on the planet.

Simon Napier-Bell is writing regular features for the Huffington Post which can be read here.
 At Simon's website you can find more about his books.
Here is Elvis with You Don't Have To Say You Love Me :

exclusive : Michael Jackson - It Was An Accident !

A missive arrives from the Australian lawyer Victor Zammit who authored a book titled : A Lawyer Presents The Evidence For Life After Death. 

Mr Zammitt now retired, is a sort of psychic detective and seeks proof of the afterlife. He's on the hit-list of various skeptics organisations but beavers away to prove we will continue after this plane of existence. On his website you can read 'what happens when you die'.

In his message Victor has invited the Shuttle to attend a demonstration of  

'physcial  mediumship" in which various things will happen-trumpets blaring, tables tipping , musical instruments played by spirits,  flashing lights and such. Even more exciting there promises to be 'materialisations'.

The seance is to be conducted by 2 gentlemen, Tom and Kevin  from The Yellow Cloud Circle of Eternal Illumination in Toulouse in France.

Freddie's hand

A quick visit to their website reveals some remarkable testimonials. We were particularly drawn to one from Isabelle Duchene from Belgium who attended 2 seances and was privileged to see Freddie Mercury's hand appear from under a curtain !. She knows the hand belonged to Freddie because:

"spirit has confirmed it was the hand of Freddie Mercury the lead singer of Queen. Freddie sang with us on the song that was played, 'don't stop me' now that was made famous by the group "

Mr Zammit himself has left a glowing tribute after one seance he attended where  Michael Jackson appeared with the following words :

'Hello! My name is  Michael Joseph Jackson: I've come here today..

This is very difficult..difficult for me. I have  come back today to say there will be no recurrences with people who have been accused of my death. I did not commit suicide. Although I take full responsibility for my death. There should be no charges brought from anybody. I am totally responsible for my passing.  That is all I wanted to say. And I will carry on my work from this side of life. And I hope that the world will listen this time. Thank you ".

Anyone have a contact number for Dr. Conrad Murray ?

On Monday preliminary hearings took place to determine if Murray should stand trial for involuntary manslaughter in Jackson's death in June 25, 2009. When the case is dropped-remember you read it here first.

Here's Freddie Mercury singing 'I Want To Break Free' which he did do eventually.