Day Five.....

The UK MailOnline's exciting experiment to inject some colour and movement into the storm ridden lives of the English continues with yet another instalment on the great Brynne & Geoffrey Edelsten saga.

Readers again have posted pithy and accurate comments along the lines of "who" ? although one kinder gent called stantheman has praised Geoffrey  and says :"If my wife or partner looks anything like her when I'm 70,then I'm going to go to heaven a happy man.'
A feature on the dating habits of the daughter of cricketing legend Shane Warne has drawn a blank with readers but another on 2 wireless disc jockeys Kyle and Jackie O (she has no last name apparently)- much beloved of writers on tabloids like the Sydney Morning Herald brings the following : "seriously, who is paying you to promote these Z-list Australian nobodies?"Who on earth cares??"never listened to vyle never have never will'

It's just a matter of time before the hapless Brits are treated to tales of over-exposed radio hack Fifi Box falling pregnant again or going on a diet.

Artemis,Packer, Picasso and Obama

Shanthini Naidoo & Ros Packer at the Picasso show

She was at the Art Gallery of NSW last Friday taking in the Picasso exhibition- Ros Packer, the widow of the late media mogul Kerry Packer who passed away in 2008. On the same day a remarkable sculpture was being loaded on a ship bound for Australia where it will arrive on December 27^th.

A report has emerged claiming Ros may have been the purchaser of the giant bronze sculpture by British artist Nic Fiddian-Green which has recently been on display at Goodwood Racecourse.

Titled Artemis after the Greek god, its name has now reverted to the original name given it by the artist: ‘I Look Beyond for a Distant Land’.

The Midhurst & Petworth Observer newspaper says the 40ft high piece is on its way to Australia where it has been “bought by the widow of an Australian media mogul who had strong links with the equine world. She has collected work by Mr Fiddian-Green for the past 15 years.”

Kerry’s grave is at his beloved property Ellerston in the Hunter Valley where there is already some of the artist’s work and it's believed the sculpture will overlook his resting place.

Artemis

Nic Fiddian-Green

Son James Packer who inherited Kerry’s $6B fortune and was recently entertaining Tiger Woods, Shane Warne and Elizabeth Hurley at his Crown Casino in Melbourne has undertaken extensive renovations at Ellerston including installing a new Olympic size swimming pool, upgrading the private Polo field , building several guest cottages and landscaping the gardens.

Meanwhile Ros Packer will be in Canberra today to attend a reception for the US president Barack Obama.

Get A Glimpse Of Joan Here

Joan at Flemington

Do not fret-the Chloe & Kim Kardashian charabanc may have fled town after turning down the $150,000  fee for an appearance at the Melbourne's Spring Carnival for Swisse , but Joan Collins now has a Sydney show as part of her one woman bandwagon. The Shuttle's Kardashian spy disguised as an over-priced handbag says their agent ordered Kim to return asap to LA to cash-in field offers from major US networks to discuss her collapsed publicity stunt marriage.

Warnie & Hurley at Ladies Day

Joan was at the Ladies Day at Flemington yesterday looking as glamorous as she ever did in Dynasty, hard as that may be, and her outfit could definitely have come straight from the 80's series.

There are still tickets available for
A Night With Joan at the State Theatre on Monday evening, 7th November but be quick. They are going fast. Book at Ticketmaster.

below is a promo clip from A Night With Joan with such memorable lines as
"a woman who would reveal her age would reveal anything"!

Your Melbourne Cup Form Guide

It's come a long way since Jean Shrimpton-The Shrimp- shocked and outraged and positively delighted the crowds at Flemington in Melbourne in 1965 and established once and for all time, The Mini Skirt was here to stay ( it looks so tame today).

Today as a few hundred thousand racegoers descend upon Flemington racecourse for the Melbourne Cup we've provided a handy form guide for the fillies and their jockeys to look out for in the Birdcage, Member's Stand and the private marquees (hover around the Emirates for the real action)

Starting with the richest :
Billionaire James Packer and wife Erica (be nice to them and they may invite you back to James' private bar at the Crown Casino for their karaoke night) and Richard Branson.
Celeb receiving the most for showing up (about 200 grand) Sarah Jessica Parker.

Lovebirds Shane Warne and Elizabeth Hurley. Burlesque queen Dita Von Teese, Kim Kardashian  Rebecca Judd and the real star of the day who should not missed (easy to do as she's so tiny) Joan Collins. And there is bound to be a few surprises like Leo DiCaprio and Tobey McGuire

Mumm champagne, Moet & Chandon, Bollinger will all be hosting marquees and in "Millionaire's Row", the Emirates marquee is styled on St Petersburg's Catherine Palace with the Zhivago restaurant and powder room for ladies, and a Jo Malone perfume stylist demonstrating how to "accessorise" with 23 fragrances.

 Myer's have their "Butterfly House" with Jennifer Hawkins complete with  fluttering laser-cut butterflies, as the PR sheet wittily says..'to show off the social butterflies". 

Garden guru Jamie Durie has flown back from the USA where he hosts a cable TV show to create a "vertical garden installation" in a three-level marquee and VIPs will  be chauffeured to and from the track in luxury Lexus vehicles.

Irreverent / Irrelevant Facts : The first Melbourne Cup in 1861 was filmed and this was the very first  movie to be screened commercially.

The first prize in 1861 for owners of the winning horse-a nice watch while today's prize purse will be $3.5M. The Shuttle's favourite horse name of all time : Whykickamoocow.

Lara Bingle's Handsome New Hunk

While Britain is hearing the news that texting menace, cricketer and professional toupee model Shane Warne has been getting up close and personal with actress Elizabeth Hurley, the Shuttle hears that Lara Bingle so publicly dumped by cricketer Michael Clarke has found a new man and not only is he a handsome Yank but a model and top DJ to boot.

Didier Cohen has been working in Sydney modelling for department store David Jones. With deep blue eyes and hunky looks he swept Lara off her feet after the 2 met at the Beach Haus nightclub in Kings Cross 2 months ago where Didier was guest disc jockey.

Didier Cohen & Miranda Kerr model for DJs

Cohen returned to the USA to complete modelling commitments-he is represented by the prestige Wilhelmina's Agency  and is now back to spend summer in Sydney with Lara.

Lara has struggled since she was embarrassed by the revelation she had had a brief affair with  footballer Brendan Fevola whose wife left him when the affair became public.

Bingle says she had no idea Fevola was married at the time. That led to Clarke calling off their engagement and  Lara became the victim of a bitchy media campaign where everything from her dress sense to intelligence was questioned by tabloid columnists. It is after all Australia and dumping on a cricketer is considered tantamount to treason.

Evidence-see how Warne who maintains an on and off again relationship with his long suffering  ex-wife Simone is the subject of countless admiring stories by journalists.

But Lara, one of the nicest gals around town and a Shuttle pal is back on her feet and has just signed a lucrative new 3 year contract with Speedo.  And now a new man untainted by local scandal-nice.