Arise Sir Frank

Completely nu-noticed by the Mainstream Media possibly because No Kardashian was harmed during the making of this news, it didn't involve the late Princess Diana and Meghan Markle has nothing to do with it, but one of Australia's richest men has been knighted by Her Majesty, Queen of Australia,

Plain old Frank Lowy worth a reputed $8Billion who lives in Sydney's Bellevue Hill now becomes Sir Frank Lowy. Lowy is the mastermind of the giant Westfield Shopping plazas that now dot the landscape in Australia, the US and the UK. He was quietly knighted a month ago. One of Britain's largest Westfield is in the shadow of the dreadful Grenfeel building in West London. The Brits have taken to them like ducks to water.
And it was not for the services of confusing shoppers world-wide as to where they parked their car in a Westfield car-park, rather for his services to industry which have been considerable certainly in his adopted Australia where he arrived as a penniless refugee after WW2. You could read more of Sir Frank's fascinating history here.

Conversations with Conservatives

The fragrant David Flint, champion of Her Majesty The Queen of Australia and committed Monarchist has come so far since we shared drinks in the saloon bar of the Windsor Castle Hotel in Paddington so many moons ago. Bachelor David was just a young chap then and The Windsor Castle has now become a private home but in it's heyday it was packed to the gills with every know version of humanity in Sydney & made Oxford Street of the 1980/90s look like a church picnic.

Now Flinty has interviewed, for your enjoyment Australia's richest woman and one of the world's wealthiest people Gina Rinehart.
Be warned- the late US president Ronald Reagan is liberally quoted as an authority and that old corrupt lovable rogue Sir Joh Bjelke Petersen is spoken of in fond terms.

Malcolm Turnbull is not who you think he is !

Whispers has come across all manner of odd tales but this one really caught our eye. The Internet is awash with conspiracy rumours and we love this one : our newly minted prime Minster Malcolm Turnbull is not who you think he is. 'Crisis actors' is one of the weirder conspiracy claims of the "truther " movement (they also say the Earth really is flat & the Moon Landing was faked) : these are actors who pretend to be 'victims' of the so-called 'false flag' events where the truthers claim every terrible action is a staged secret government plot as they lead us onto the New World Order, take away every citizen's gun in the USA and so on. Part of the grand conspiracy is that actors play the part of world leaders.
Our favourite was the claim that HM Queen Elizabeth was actually the Golden Girl star Betty White (they do look similar in a low light) but now it has been revealed : Malcolm Turnbull is in fact the star of Hannibal Lecter films Anthony Hopkins. Not only that, former PM Julia Gillard is in reality the Hollywood actress Jodie Foster !
Whispers has encountered all 4 of these personalities in person including being a guest at a dinner at Turnbull's Point Piper mansion, a book launch hosted by Julia Gillard, a small reception at Sydney's Fox Studios for Jodie Foster and 2 movie premiers with actor Hopkins.
Crucially : we have never seen all four at the same time in the same room !. We report, you decide.

It's A Girl !..but not a Princess yet

Not long ago we chided a Sydney columnist for gushing that Royalty, in the form of horse loving Zara Phillips, had attended the Magic Millions on the Gold Coast in Queensland. Zara is a commoner as are all children born to those with Royal titles unless HM The Queen confers titles upon them.
Of course Her Maj usually does as a matter of course unless the parents decide otherwise as in Zara's case where her parents HH Princess Anne and Captain Mark Phillips decided to turn down the offer.
While a colonial writer and even a New York paper (as out pic shows) may be forgiven for making a common mistake, it's unacceptable for British newspapers who have also elevated the Duchess & Duke of Cambridge's newly born daughter to Princess status when, in reality she is a commoner at this stage. Talk about slack fact checking!.
Nothing is guaranteed in the world of Royalty where they ( and their handlers / courtiers) more than anyone judge the mood of the general public.
 Kate and William may just decide to accept no title for the new bub,
Time will tell but I'm sure she's a little princess in their eyes.


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Fairfax Fail : The Sydney Morning Herald and The Age have both failed in the fact checking
department. Are we being pedantic?. I think not as this indicates how journalists these days fail to do the most basic fact checking.
Calling the new baby a "princess" is simply wrong until the Monarch confers a title upon her.
In fact she will not even strictly be a 'royal' unless she is given a peerage as well which is why her parents were created the Duke & Duchess of Cambridge which is also why her grandfather Prince Phillip was created the Duke of Edinburgh before he married the Queen so that she would not be marrying a commoner.
Last month with such sloppy fact-checking we had 2 large publishers killing of Australian actress Nell Campbell on the claim she was comedienne Tracey Ullman's mother.
# Even Whispers is less than perfect. We did forget that the recently born and now (created by the Monarch of Great Britain) Her Royal Highness the Princess Charlotte of Cambridge was a Lady from the word go. Being the daughter of a Duke & Duchess she is entitled to that title.
Critics again have attacked me for being pedantic which is nonsense. British titles are a powerful legal entity crafted over centuries of law making. The new Royal Princess could one day also be the Queen of Australia. We aren't a Republic yet (if ever) and it's sad that major media outlets in this country can display such ignorance. What other mistakes are they making?
It's remarkable that newspapers that lived and breathed the late princess Diana have ignored the fact that she felt the cruelest blow to her after divorcing the future King, Prince Charles was losing her Royal status.

Happy one day...

Just last week the ex-Mrs Packer Jodhi Meares was happily ensconced in the arms of fiance, former INXS singer Jon Stevens at David Jones Autumn Spring fashion show as our exclusive picture shows.
Today police have requested an Apprehended Violence Order (AVO) after Stevens was arrested during a fracas with Jodhi in their Point Piper home. Stevens will appear in Waverely Court on Thusday and according to friends is staying with a pal in Potts Point.
## Not a word has appeared in Australian newspapers : the Chinese government is about to clamp down on Chinese citizens traveling abroad on gambling junkets to Australia, Las Vegas Macau and elsewhere. They make up the bulk of cash that flows into these casinos. James Packer has invested $billions in all 3 locations.
Below is the first Royal Selfie from Buckingham Palace. Taken during a birthday party and tweeted for the world to see.

That orange vest

Royal Ascot, Royal Secrets

Please watch the video first as an introduction : that's a command from Her Maj, Queen of Australia (UK, Canada etc etc and so on) who is seen in our exclusive snap arriving at the pollies' Mid-Winter Ball in Canberra last week.

           It's very chilly in Sydney with a wind howling down from the snowfields but in London it's bright and sunny and that time of the year for Wimbledon, Windsor Polo and the races at Royal Ascot. Plenty of pics have been published of famous Aussies in the VIP Box at the tennis but here are our exclusive snaps of ritzy Double Bay hairdresser Joh Bailey who has taken Ascot by storm. And doesn't he look elegant? (no idea who the lady in top hat is but she looks great)
 Joh is a fine horseman himself so he has a great interest in the beasts and when he isn't tending to the locks of Sydney society matrons or visiting celebs like the Duchess of York or movie legend Jane Fonda- seen with Joh in our snap - he's appearing at gymkhanas and horse trials. At present he's moved on from the grand Belgravia mansion he was staying in and is now in Paris. Ain't life grand for some !

## The Shuttle has attended Ascot twice. Many moons ago we traveled in style in a Range Rover with a good friend Stephen Barry who worked at Buck Palace.  Amazingly, Barry's car was waved through at blocked intersections by police as they spotted him bearing down on them. They held up traffic as we sailed past. It's then we learned the car was owned by Barry's employer Prince Charles and he had borrowed it for the day. Being painted a special blue supplied by British Paints, a colour reserved for the Royals (right), it's how we discovered that all British police are trained in spotting the special coloured cars to ensure smooth passage of VIPs. Like us.
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          Below is a pic of the Windsor Polo and the Cartier Cup. It's a splendid snap and we love the lady in front. Apparently in one of our snaps is a royal impersonator and in our other snap it's a genuine Royal. We can't tell which is which, perhaps you can!

New Royal Baby Snaps with The Queen

Our exclusive photographs of Prince George with his parents the Duke & Duchess of Cambridge and his great grandmother HM The Queen

It's more mischief from the British photographer Alison Jackson whose amazing pictures can be seen here. And Prince William ? : he is in fact 30 year old Simon Watkinson who is an Adelaide born engineer living and working in the UK but cleaning up as the best royal impersonator in the business.
Below is an Alison Jackson video of Kate & The Queen at the hairdressers.

Video Of The Day : The Queen Explodes

 Dame Helen Mirren berates a team of ear-splitting drummers outside the Gielgud Theatre in Soho, London who performed while she was trying to give a performance as The Queen.
The drummers were advertising London’s As One In the Park gay music festival. What is about gay festivals and bloody drums ?. Bad enough that the old phoney Madonna is adored by the gay community but they have penchant for loud drums as any Sydneysider who wanders near Oxford Street will discover.
Video by Chris Dangerfield.

God Abandons Rupert!

It just goes from bad to worse for Rupert Murdoch.
With News having just posted a $1.9 Billion loss today, yesterday the Church Of England (CEO : HM The Queen) announced that it had sold it shares in News Corp for $3 million because of the "bad behaviour" of some of it's newspapers.

Andrew Whittam Smith is the First Church Estate's Commissioner and in charge of their finances. He is also the founder of the Independent Newspaper which along with The Guardian has been on the attack over the great hacking scandal and other matters previously. It was he who made the decision to sell the Church's stake in News.
A former journalist and the son of an Anglican vicar, Whittam Smith is far from being a prude and was once president of the British Film Board Classification and was responsible during the 90s for liberalising what naughty parts Brits could see in videos and films. Until then it had languished about 50 years behind the rest of Europe.
He also thinks Scotland Yard may soon be feeling the collars of both James Murdoch and his father for having breached Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act 2000 and is quoted as saying:
"“It means that if you have presided over an organisation that has conducted criminal activities, either you have the orders, or you gave permission, or you connived, but if you did none of these things, then you were neglectful. That, I believe, is the trap in which the directors of News International find themselves."

Could this be why Rupert and James are both moving permanently to New York?. Given how the British courts are now closely co-operating with US courts in extradition matters ala Julian Assange, perhaps both could seek sanctuary in Australia House in The Strand and ask for asylum.

What An Entrance!

Knit your own Queen & Dame Kylie!

Press Association

  The lack of Union Jacks fluttering from Sydney buildings was noticeable. Melbourne did a little better. Perth with an immigrant population of Brits comprising around 30% was by far the winner with countless Jubilee parties and bunting. Canberra begrudgingly hung one from Parliament House. 

She is, after all our Queen as well. Thank God for the Singing Budgie Kylie Minogue cunningly disguised as a Pearly Queen, and Rolf Harris CBE,AM at the Diamond Jubilee Concert. (Surely it soon should be Dame Kylie and Sir Rolf!) 

 

 

Press Association

Here is a treat for you to while away the hours during these gale force winds and pounding rain: 

Knit your own Queen!

Yes, with a little patience and this pattern, it really is possible to make your own spectacular Diamond Jubilee memento…

YOU WILL NEED

For the doll
◆20g (¾oz), approximately 37m (40yds), of beige DK yarn.
◆ A small amount of pale grey DK yarn.
◆ Very small amounts of black, cream and red DK yarn.
◆ 10–15g (¼–½oz) polyester toy stuffing.
For the clothes
◆ 25g (1 oz), approximately 55m/60yds, of royal blue DK yarn.
◆ A small amount of black DK yarn.
To get the rest of the instructions you need to go the Britain's oldest published magazine The Lady here.

Right Royal Punch Up

Barry Everingham

Verbal fisticuffs have broken out between Australian republican advocate and Melbourne journalist Barry Everingham and the vocal defender of the British Royals, the immaculately attired and coiffured  David Flint who is head of Australians for Constitutional Monarchy (ACM) .

David Flint

Everingham, who has been described as the "ultimate name dropper" is something of an expert on the royals and has reported on royal weddings for US cable TV MSNBC.
 He penned a biography of Princess "Pushy" Michael of Kent and his royal connections appear to be impeccable.

He's sipped cocktails with the late Princess Margaret and was once told by HM The Queen at a party on the Britannica in Kuwait Harbour  to "be as naughty as you like" before she quizzed him about Sultan Qaboos of Oman's new palace in Muscat (the Shuttle has been inside-it's magnificent!).
 Everingham is a contributor to the ABC's The Drum and News Ltd's The Punch. One delightful piece from his biog tells how he once danced with Imelda Marcos after being commanded to by Lady Mary Fairfax.

Writing for Independent Australia, an on-line forum in a piece called Fantasies & Follies of Flint Everingham says:
"David Flint’s rantings and slurs on anyone who disagrees with him is a disgrace to the monarchist cause"  calling Flint a "disgraceful upholder of a moth eaten, out-of-date and insulting system of inherited privilege" . Heady stuff.

Flint has cried foul and responded a week ago in this piece on the IA website crying 'defamation' and says numerous furphies have been perpetuated about his relationship with former PM John Howard who successfully scuppered the Republcian referendum in 1999.
Howard appointed Flint ( a former head of the Press Council ) as head of the Australian Broadcasting Authority (ABA) but that appointment ended in tears when Flint resigned in 2004 after being interviewed by Rado csar John Laws on his morning show whilst the ABA was investigating Laws over the 'cash for comments' scandal.

We feel sure there is much more titilation to come from this scuffle but in the meantime, here is David Flint wearing his Mystic Meg hat with predictions in 2010 where he confidently predicts the mining "Super Profits Tax will end in a legal minefield " (hasn't happened yet) and that Julia Gillard will be defeated at the general election in 2011. She won.

Queen Losing Her Hair

Connolly

Charles

The UK has not only the genuine article but a clever look-a-like who has made a lifetime career out of impersonating her.

We refer to HM The Queen and her impersonator Jeanette Charles who has featured in endless TV commercials playing Her Maj and even been hired by social climbing European businessmen to accompany them to social events.

Australia has it's very own impersonator- comedian Gerry Connolly who appears to have lost his precious royal wig after leaving it in the foyer of the Regents Court Hotel in Kings Cross according to this report in the Sydney Morning Herald.
Connolly has been scouring the Cross and believes the hairpiece has been snatched by a drag queen. He found the other articles that were in the bag along with the wig before it's disappearing act, abandoned in a nearby rubbish bin.

We've uncovered a recent video of Connolly ala The Queen from when he appeared on a tribute show for TV host Bert Newton celebrating his 70th birthday. If you spot a shifty looking drag queen wearing what looks like the hair adornment in this video, contact Gerry at Celebrity Speakers. There may be a reward in the form of a title, medal or invitation to a Royal Garden Party :

Clive James on Queen's Honours List

Sydney born Clive James, author, poet and broadcaster has received a CBE (Commander of the British Empire) medal for services to Literature and the Media in the Queen's New Years Honours List.

Other show biz recipients include comedian Ronnie Corbet and actress Helena Bonham Carter.

Read the full list here.

Prime Ministers, Book Launches and Slapped Faces

Last Monday Sue Pieters-Hawke launched her book Hazel: My Mother's Story at the SH Erwin Gallery and it was a fairly quiet affair.

Hazel & Bob in happier days

There was none of the fanfare that accompanied the launch of the book her step-mother Blanche d'Alpuget authored -Hawke, The Prime Minister about Sue's dad, former Prime Minster Bob Hawke who is still regarded as the most popular leader Australia has ever had.

The current PM Julia Gillard did the honours for Blanche's tome in front of a number of notable guests like actors Geoffrey Rush and Rhys Muldoon and former Midnight Oil front man Peter Garrett who is now the Minister for Education.

Last June it was alleged that Blanche and Sue had encountered each other in the Qantas's exclusive Chairman's Lounge at Brisbane Airport and each had slapped the other's face before being separated by authorities. Both denied the claim but witnesses say the incident was fairly heated although it's claimed the two have since made up.

Blanche, Julia & Bob

Despite this neither Bob Hawke nor Blanche attended Sue's book launch which Pieters-Hawke has written in retaliation to d'Alpuget's impliction that Hazel only stayed married to Hawke while he was PM so she could stay in The Lodge at Canberra and enjoy her role as first lady. 

Sue Pieters-Hawke's book covers Hazel's life from a schoolgirl in Perth, her life with Bob -''the love of her life'' - her career in welfare, life at The Lodge and her sad decline into Alzheimer's disease in 2001.
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Meanwhile the man who deposed Bob Hawke in a party room coup, former PM  Paul Keating launched his own book After Words on Sunday.
Keating, who was dubbed The Lizard of Oz by the British media in 1992 who accused him of manhandling HM The Queen has likened Australia to "a child clasping at the Queen's coat-tails, waving an embarrassing little flag' in a Daily Telegraph report.

                                        
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Not to be left out, former PM Kevin Rudd, himself deposed 2 years ago by Julia Gillard has been entertaining a crowd at a function following a meeting of Foreign Ministers at the CHOGM conference in Perth. The audience demanded Rudd break into song but he informed them "I sing like a cow".
(What does a cow sound like when it sings?)

Some History On Her Maj

On the day our Sovereign, Elizabeth 11 ( aka Queen of Australia ) arrives in Canberra (note to various TV and tabloid journalists-you know who you are- it's HM The Queen, not HRH The Queen) for her sixteenth visit we bring a nice film we have uncovered of her first visit Down Under in 1954.

She must be dedicated to her subjects. Five days in Canberra?. Better her than me.

Letteing The Side Down

The picture below of  Puberty Blues author Kathy Lette in her corgi dress giving HM The Queen a good laugh has now swept the world and cements Kathy's place as one of the best Antipodean self publicists in the UK.

Barry Humphries at Kathy's launch

Richard E.Grant

Lette was at Buckingham Palace for a reception hosted by Her Maj before her final trip Down Under. The Queen was heard to comment that she didn't realise there so many Australians in Britain which really shows she obviously doesn't get out much. Immigration records show there are close to 600,000 Aussies at present residing in the UK.

Kathy is quoted today telling a newspaper columnist about her trip to Buckingham palace : "As we’re all convict stock, I bet they spent all day hiding the silverware, don’t you? At least I made the Queen laugh. A first, I’m sure."
"The only funny thing was that the Palace had under-estimated the party potential of a bunch of wild colonials. We were practically swinging from the chandeliers. I gave the Queen a matching corgi scarf, so I do hope she’s going to wear it Down Under. I was very relieved that nothing mated with my leg, in that outfit."

The Shuttle has encountered Kathy and her husband barrister Geoffrey Robertson ( having shared a desk with Geoffrey in High School) many times on their visits to Sydney, the last being the launch of her book Mad Cow at the Boy Charlton Pool where actor Richard E.Grant did the honours.

Kathy's book launch in Sydney

Chatting to Robertson about Kathy's books he told us: "they don't sell that well in the UK  but she is a massive seller in Germany" . Asked to elaborate as to why this may be Geoffrey said "Kathy writes books that send up the British and the Germans lap them up. They have a more base sense of humour than the Brits as well so she seems in tune with them !".
The last time the Shuttle encountered the Queen in London at an official function was a reception at Australia House in the Strand many years ago. One aging journalist from Melbourne was there and was known to be not only a drunk but incontinent as well , sometimes forgetting to wear his protective pads. A group of us watched from the sidelines in horror as the man chatted to Prince Phillip, a puddle of piss gathering around their feet. When Phillip walked away we could hear his shoes squelching.

Prince William Clone Making a Royal Mint

Simon Watkinson

Even as a child in an Adelaide primary school 29 year old Simon Watkinson received comments about his resemblance to the heir of the British throne, HRH Prince William.

Simon says his grandmother looked like William's granny as well.

A civil engineer who has been working in London for 4 years, Simon has struck pay dirt working for an agency as a William look-a-like and is the most successful royal clone in the UK at present. He is commanding fees of up to $4000 a day and is in high demand by corporate sponsors. People hire him and a 'Kate Middleton' just to walk around at parties which is nice work if you can get  a grand a pop.

One of the most gifted artists who specialises in royal look-a-like photo and video shoots, artist Alison Jackson has used Simon several times in books and films. Three Australian TV networks have interviewed him outside Buckingham Palace and he regularly gets swamped by tourists who, if they can't have the real thing, they'll have Simon as the next best thing. The British mobile phone company T-Mobile used him and a bunch of others in a spoof wedding video that has gone viral.

It's an odd thing the look-a-like business.  Jason Thompson (above)from Sydney is making a mint in the USA as HRH The Queen, hosting corporate events. He greets guests on the red carpet upon arrival or arrives with a big entrance singing a song and then wanders the crowd intermingling with guests and chatting. Jason says the number of times female guests courtesy is alarming. (he also does Dame Edna Everage and Steve Irwin).

Jeanette Charles in Naked Gun

Probably the most famous royal impersonator is Jeanette Charles who at 84 has had a lifetime of employment acting as the head of the royal family. Jeanette appeared in numerous films from the National Lampoon series to Austin Powers and the Naked Gun series as The Queen.

She did dozens of TV and newspaper advertisements and was once hired by a Paris based businessman who paid her a small fortune to accompany him in a limousine throughout Europe to get tongues wagging that he was able to get up close and personal with a British royal. The story goes that it worked and he scored  numerous lucrative government contracts in France, Italy and Russia.

Simon Watkinson should be making a very nice living for the next decade or so, even if he does have more hair than the real thing !

Hold my hose: William and Michael Middleton clean the car by Alison Jackson

Breaking news : The Chasers comedy team who scored world-wide fame when they gate-crashed APEC in Sydney as Osama Bin Laden have been banned from covering the royal wedding for ABC TV on orders from Clarence House : Below is the film of the Chasers at APEC: