C*cks, Censorship And Madame Arcati

Madame Arcati has finally made the move to Anorak.co.uk. In true Arcati form her opening line :

"HELLO, bitches. God knows what I’m doing here."

 Read it here and get ready for a bumpy ride.

Madame Arcati refuses to be censored

The Madame Arcati blog site has been outraging readers for 4 years now-in particular the Fleet Street brigade of hacks and time-servers on Britain's variety of tabloids who are loathe to have a spotlight beamed onto their own peccadillo's and prejudices whilst retaining the right to rip into others.

Now she is packing up her wicked keyboard and switching to the tabloid style Anorak website under her own banner after Google shoved an adult content warning at the beginning of her site. A very sensible move on Anorak's part.

She has spoken of the Google debacle on the Beautiful Books site:

Madame Arcati censored by the hammies

"I had planned to unleash a considerable amount of articulate obscenity on this new site. Then my eye alighted on the stricture here that nothing should go up that might upset one’s mother – indeed, the offended are invited to draw the site owner’s attention to anything objectionable. So, given the readiness of people to be outraged - a characteristic I attribute to the ham actor in too many of us - I suppose I’d better behave myself and get to my point, temperately.

Censorship is very much a topic in mind at present. My own site, Madame Arcati, has just been gifted an 18 certificate by Google/Blogger: visitors are now greeted by a Content Warning page. Apparently, readers complained of “objectionable” material. Given that I put up my first PhotoShopped male celebrity nude about four years ago, I can’t imagine what took the uncast ham actors so long."

Hopefully her old site will still stay. One should delve back into the files. It's packed with highly amusing and witty prose with anecdotes and interviews with all manner of people that will never be found elsewhere.
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Coming soon : more on the brewing scandal over the estate of the late science fiction writer Arthur C.Clarke, a Shuttle exclusive!

The return of Steve Strange, King of the post Baby Boomers.

A story comes courtesy of Britain's most feared blogger (by tabloid editors and writers ) Madame Arcati. Madame has received an invitation to the birthday party of the legendary Steve Strange, famous as the leader of the 1980's New Romantics and who first gained attention running a small club in Soho called The Blitz.

The birthday bash is at a pub called the Green Carnation which describes itself as "the latest destination de decadence for the Soho set looking to add some sparkle to their Saturday night. ".Oh dear.

The very idea that there is still one square inch of Soho that now could lay claim to 'decadence' could only come from the mind of a PR firm. Decadence was beaten out of Soho years ago by property developers and those interminably boring barista expresso bars that are popping up on every corner from  Delhi to Reykjavick. Perhaps the only person who frequents Soho and may lay claim to decadence is the permanent fiance of Madame Arcarti, that delightful millinery challenged,  Molly Parkin.

The youngsters who flocked to The Blitz in the late 70's, early 80's wore weird and wonderful outfits, acres of make-up were a reaction to the Punk Rock movement. Stars were soon checking out the club including David Bowie, Bob Geldorf and Paula Yates, Yves St Laurent and it's said the late Lord Longford even stopped by.

Steve Strange au naturel

Steve was the King of The Kids.Whatever Steve wore, those kids appeared in their own version the following week.

Strange went on to run a series of one nighter clubs in various venues with his best mate Rusty Egan. And it was just a matter of time as his other pal Boy George became spectacularly famous with his "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me", that Egan and Strange would form a band, Visage.They soon had their own a hit record "Fade to Grey'.

Unfortunately long time success eluded Strange. Drugs and dramatic events such as a fire in his house took their toll as Steve went into a downward spiral and he retreated to his home village in Wales. He recountered his life, warts and all in his autobiography Blitzed! published in 2002.

One of our Shuttle staff was a regular at The Blitz and allowed many of those who would party on the regular Tuesday nights to crash on his Notting Hill apartment floor. Most came from the outer suburbs of London and would plan their one night of the week out, Tuesday for days. Getting home at 4 am was just impossible. Steve Strange was one who found the occasional corner to bunk down in.,

new New Romantics

Now we must go back in time to another Shuttle pal, old Etonian Nicholas Shand, heir to a printing and publishing fortune from Shropshire. Shand had forsaken the family business and taken off for the hippy trail ( with a huge inheritance) to places like Goa and  all points beyond before finally landing in the the magical Australian resort of Byron Bay, then a sleepy village and the country's most easterly point and living down it's former life as a whaling station.

With a gorgeous rolling hinterland and beautiful beaches, schools of whales now safe from the spear gun could be spotted daily ambling by the coastline accompanied by flocks of dolphins. The whole area  was God's gift to those seeking an alternative lifestyle.

 Byron Bay is now the most expensive resort in the country full of mega million dollar houses owned by the rich and famous but Shand then was able to purchase a few hundred acres and set up a small newspaper which the town lacked. With ink in the blood, so successful was his Byron Echo newspaper chain that after 10 years he refused a fortune to sell out to the Irish newspaper baron Tony O'Reilly seeking a foothold in Australian rural newspapers.

In 1979 Shand decided to return for 2 years to Shropshire where he opened a successful restaurant 'Mad Jacks' named after Mad Jack Myton, a local legend, and in between serving the local gentry like the Ormsby Gores, frequently travelled to London to stay with our Shuttle staffer. On one such visit he left behind his Peruvian poncho, a souvenir from his hippy days.

Upon awakening one morning Steve Strange seized upon the poncho and that Tuesday night appeared at The Blitz wearing it and looking like a Spaghetti Western cowboy, albeit complete with the usual layers of pancake, purple eye shadow and a bit of lippy. The following week, no less than 20 kids turned up wearing ponchos and cowboy hats, some even munching on cigars and looking like the cast of an Ennio Morricone production. They were afterall was said and done, just kids playing dress ups !

But it was all lost on the young female journalist trainee from the Independent newspaper who had been sent that night to get a handle on the new youth cult craze. She fled dazed and confused.

There's a lesson there about fashion, style and trends or some sort of moral. I think.

NB: Sadly Nicholas Shand died in a car accident on the notorious treacherous roads of Northern NSW. Outside the Byron council chambers sits a statue of him on a park bench, popular with the hundreds of tourists who flock to the area and have their photo taken with his cast-iron likeness, most of them having no idea who he is.

A study in contrasts : Visage & Steve Strange with Fade to Grey followed by Nicholas Shand.

Jonathan King probed by Madame Arcati

For the unenlightened, Madame Arcati is one of the UK's most famous bloggers with an extremely healthy and envious world-wide following. And she has a habit of getting up the collective noses of British tabloid editors and journalists.

Although one suspects Madame may also have a large fan base on the Street Of Shame as she exposes some of the nonsense and vagaries of the variety of pompous poseurs who now eek out a living writing the drivel that appears in many British newspapers as they plunge towards an uncertain future.

MA reminds tSS of the former News Ltd journo, ex-Liberal Party flack and shareholder activist Stephen Mayne who has become the bane of Rupert Murdoch's life by asking difficult questions at News Corp shareholder meetings.

Mayne started the website crikey.com.au in 2003 and (with help from tSS) quickly built it into the leading political, business and social comment website in Australia. Despite having to sell his house to pay a few libel lawsuits (without our help) he sold crikey in 2005 to former Editor-in-Chief of the Sydney Morning Herald Eric Beecher for a cool one million dollars.

That's a long-winded introduction to say, why comment on a book when Arcati gives such good review ? Read her views on pop mogul and self confessed "vile pervert" Jonathan King's autobiography. 65 My Life So Far by Jonathan King.

King has been penning best selling songs since he was a university student in 1965 when he wrote the much recorded 'Everyone's Gone To The Moon". His book is flying off the shelves and apparently has become a wildly popular read for holidaying Brits on the Mediterranean. tSS will read it when Amazon finally get's it's act together.

A small extract from Madame Arcati's review :

"Oh, JK! How could you? Or rather, how could you not?

What with all the celebs you've fucked, discovered, promoted, befriended, detested, wanked, created, re-invented, guided, supported and, yes, fucked again with your self-proclaimed 8" phallus over the decades, how could you not have had an index compiled for this monster-sized tome of star goss that is your autobiography? It took me half an hour to find the Madame Arcati mention on p570. And then I only found it by deductive reasoning.

Please, please get one done for a future reprint! Listen to a gnarled old index-loving clairvoyant."

Madame's wish may come true. On his website King says his self-published book may be about to be picked up by a major publisher.

Watch one of King's great hits-Johnny Reggae by The Piglets

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## Friday-we set our sights on Christopher Walter Monckton, 3rd Viscount Monckton of Brenchley, climate denialist and the man who single handedly won the Falklands War !

"the nation's worst journalists"

"angriest parking warden ever"

         Now the infamous British blogger Madame Arcati has compiled  "Madame Arcati's 10 most stupid journalists of 2009 " we decided it was time to visit that strange website "Australia's Worst Journalist' to find the current state of play.

      Try as we might as have others, we still cannot uncover the author of this damning compilation of noted hacks but the list remains the same-just the pecking order is different.

       Paul Barry (right) who featured at No 1 a month ago with his top selling biography of billionaire James Packer has been knocked of his perch by the Human Headline Derryn Hinch who is labelled a " RECIDIVIST CRIMINAL previously incarcerated and highly likely again ..FAILURE...". While it's true Hinch did a short stint for naming a convicted sex offender in defiance of a judge's order he's hardly a 'criminal'. And is it fair to call Derryn a failure ?. He's never been out of work since he arrived from New Zealand over 30 years ago although he has been on the merry-go-round that most journos usually find themselves on during their career.      

          Hinch always bounces back even when he outraged half the country by claiming the King of Television Graham Kennedy had died of AIDs-shocking a million housewives who until then believed that Gra Gra had just never met the right woman. Rob Astbury, once Melbourne's top sports broadcaster put that myth to rest when he penned the bestseller  'King  & I about his long love affair with Kennedy. Hinch had the good manners to apologise publicly. Although one might re-call when he fronted a tabloid TV show with his ''Shame File" sledging  the odd dole-bludger and such, comedian Ben Elton dubbed him "like the angriest parking warden I've ever seen".

     At the site you can now vote on your choice of evil reptile and it should be noted that one of tSS's favourite scribes Annette Sharp of the Daily Telegraph has only garnered a pathetic 1.8% of votes.  Poor old  Ben Butler of Sharp's Melbourne stablemate the Herald Sun has scored a whopping 67% of votes. Ben's upset someone badly.

  

We're a little troubled though with the site's description of one scandal merchant -  "Numerous factual errors. Unable to transcribe accurately factual matters or deliberately engages in falsehoods to degrade his subject, and heighten his vitriole". We agree. Said hack is as  vitriolic in print as in public ( a sad trait of many Aussie hacks) and rarely checks his facts but can be saucy at times.

       And Annette Sharp who apparently ' fabricates articles, never names so-called "sources and breaches almost every code of journalistic ethics".Errr..we always thought that keeping one's sources confidential was part of the code of a journalist's ethics.

       As to Madame Arcarti's list, she is possibly correct in most of her choices including the chubby Perez Hilton who is yet to break an original story. tSS once had to share a lift at the Sydney Hilton with Perez who wore an ill-fitting bathrobe and had decidely pungent BO.

      But Arcarti has the temerity to attack an Australian icon, who after Mother Mary McKillop is to be named as Australia's first saint by Pope Benedict in March next year, is surely next in line-Germaine Greer. Send the evil Madame hate mail immediately !

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"A week is a long time"

..in politics" famously said the former British PM Harold Wilson but it could well apply to show-biz.

What with Tiger Wood's fall from grace just a week after his Australian visit with his rampant libido on show for all the world to see (why hasn't ESSO signed him up for a "put a Tiger in your tank" advert campaign ?) and  Home & Away's Todd Lasance's career stalled just as Hollywood beckoned.

      

Now 2GB radio host Chris Smith, pictured right just over a month ago happily posing here with his wife Abbey and publicist Sally Burleigh for tSS at a Variety Club bash, has had his career put on hold indefinitely after it's alleged he 'groped' 3 girls at the radio station's Christmas party. Chris says he is bi-polar and has a drinking problem and cannot re-call the event. Chris also says Abbey and the kids have temporarily left the marital home

Meanwhile Sally Burleigh pictured left with ex-husband actor Steve Bisley in happier days ,was in the Downing Street Centre courts today telling of how Steve allegedly pushed her head against a wall leaving a dent and that "all hell broke loose"during a domestic at their Balmain home. Bisley has been charged with assaulting Sally, which he vigorously denies. Currently starring in Sea Patrol, Bisley also appeared in the famous Mad Max films

Exclusive : Rock legend Jimi Hendrix was a pedophile !

Well that's possibly the headline a tabloid like Britain's The Sun would run today.

A new autobiography just released by former pop singer and music business identity Jonathan King who had a string of hit records in the 1960's through to the 80's relates the story of how the late rocker Jimi Hendrix had sex with a 14 year old fan and caught a venereal disease from her.

In his book Jonathan King, 65 My Life So Far King says he used to "nag Hendrix to scale down the drugs and have sex with a 'better class of girl' ". He writes "At least 3 times in private Hendrix whipped out his reasonably substantial dick to reveal to me a vast amount of discharge oozing from his infected organ."

" Did I think he had VD again?" he'd ask King innocently. And once swore, when I confirmed it, 'Christ she can't have been more than 14 years old! " said Hendrix referring to the young female fan he had just had sex with.

Jonathan King is his pop star days

King's book contains a host of bawdy revelations and tales of sexual romps involving some of the biggest names of the rock world from the 60's to the 90's and includes revelations about bi-sexual orgies he attended with former Beatle John Lennon (see story below).

Others stories including King's own claim he slept with 12 girls in a row after his number 1 hit " Everyone's Gone to the Moon" written and released when he was still a university student can be found on the Madame Arcati blog.

King holds back nothing in his book and goes into great depth about his 2001 conviction on sex charges for which he spent nearly 4 years in jail for. During his incarceration he spent his time assisting other prisoners prepare appeals against their convictions. On his release he made a highly amusing movie about his ordeal which can be viewed on-line at Vile Pervert

And here is King's 1965 first big hit record which sold 4 million copies:

exclusive : Beatle John Lennon's bi-sexual orgies !

The British blogger Madame Arcati says a new book reveals that former Beatle John Lennon indulged in bi-sexual orgies. Former pop king Jonathan King who has sold over 40 million records in his time reveals the tale in his just released autobiography 65 My Life So Far.
                 There have been persistent rumours about Lennon's sexuality over the years especially concerning his manager and the discoverer of  The Beatles, Brian Epstein.
               Lennon's first wife Cynthia, who John married in 1968 but also had been living with since their art school days and possibly knew the Beatle better than anyone including Yoko Ono, details in her 2004 book John the complicated relationship between Lennon and Epstein.

          Although she denies it was sexual she does concede it was an extremely complex relationship with Lennon at times being excessively cruel to Epstein whist at the same time expressing his deep admiration for the man.
                   When Brian Epstein committed suicide in 1967 it was said that he was upset at the possibility of losing  management of The Beatles whilst close friends claimed that Epstein was distraught at losing his influence with Lennon who they said he was obsessed with. Cynthia says Lennon, assassinated in New York in 1980 was devastated at the news of Epstein's death.              
                    A contemporary of Epsteins, the music identity Simon Napier-Bell relates the tale of receiving a long rambling phone message about Lennon from Epstein on his answering machine the night the Beatles manager killed himself.
                  Jonathan King had his first massive hit record in 1965 with his song "Everyones Gone To The Moon" whilst he was still a university undergraduate and went onto have a string of pop hits over the years as well as producing records for top bands like 10CC and Genesis, worked with bands like Iron Maiden, Def Leppard and Whitesnake, ran his own record company, stood for Parliament, hosted TV shows and wrote for newspapers and produced the Eurovision Song Contest.
             He also did a stint in jail and currently has an appeal over that court case before the European Court of Human Rights.

King says in his book that "two or three times" in the 60s, Lennon stayed over at his flat with with several young ladies and was perfectly happy to indulge in a multi-gender session of stimulation."


65 My Life So Far can be obtained at Amazon.
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## tSS has had to sack one staff member after a kind reader pointed out that dreadful spelling mistakes have been rampant throughout posts. The office moggie Mildred Pierce who doubled as a sub-editor has been banished from the office and only fear of the RSPCA who have already pounced upon 2 cast members of "I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here"over the demise of a rat prevents us from removing the feline from the building..

It's also recommended that one should always double check one's work if using one of those new mini laptops if your sight is not up to par.

we are the new media

So says film-maker and artist Bruno Grasswill the son of a noted French film director. Bruno was filming everything that moved and didn't, at the launch of top foodie Lyndey Milan's 4th book The Best Collection. Bruno is also married to top ABC TV producer Helen Grasswill, the driving force behind the hugely successful Australian Story (which featured the Shuttle once-we are biased) and Oz sections for the US series Entertainment Tonight.

Both were guests at the swell shindig given by Lyndey's merchant banker boyfriend in his magnificent duplex apartment in the Ikon building in Kings Cross. The Ikon is the home away from home (and the best kept secret until now) of Hollywood royalty and visiting film stars working at the near-by Fox Studios.With the most commanding views of the Sydney skyline from the harbor heads to the Opera House and beyond, it's hard to top these homes.

Lyndey presents food sections on the top morning show hosted by Kerri Anne Kennerley and is food editor on the Packer family pride and joy, the Woman's Weekly (which is published monthy to confuse readers). She is also a hostess with mostess-in every way. Bruno also painted a fab portrait of Lyndey for beau John and when our party gal saw it she immediately requested more cleavage should be added. Those who know the lovely Lyndey know this is par for the course. Delicious nibbles at the party came from Lyndey's recipes and were passed around by the handsome waiters from Mandy Foley-Quin's Stedmans (the French government is trying to lure this top caterer to Paris).
                                  


Food legend Margaret Fulton launched the book. At 85 , Scot's born Margaret has now sold millions of cookbooks and knows a great chef when she sees one.  In between glasses of champers and vintage wines from Lyndey's own cellar we forced down Bloody Mary shooters with oysters. And every time we tried to leave another crate of French champagne was wheeled out. Who are we to disappoint ?. No-one can actually re-call what time they left but the Shuttle woke up this morning clutching a bottle of wonderful Taittinger. Get the book now. For Christmas.

                       




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A darling of the new media Madame Arcati features a video on her blog by writer Duncan Fallowell. It's a superb piece titled  Andy Warhol in Church :



Check out Fallowell's books on his site. They are really very good. Put him on your reading list.Now.

Howling at the Moon

Yoko unravels


Britain's most irreverent blogger Madame Arcati brings news of a missive that arrives from Yoko Ono in her endless quest to make a million $$ from, I mean preserve the memory of former Beatle John Lennon.

Ono has purchased a plot of land on the Moon to honour Lennon named the '"Peace Crater". At $34.25 an acre from some firm called the Lunar Republic Society, Lennon's plot isn't in the smartest area-unusual for Yoko. It's in the Lake of Dreams and any budding realtor knows the Sea of Tranquility is far grander.

The Shuttle's going to pass on the generous offers for Moon plots-even at the lower end of the scale and the budget bargain price of $18.95 an acre in the appropriately named Sea of Vapours.

Travelling to visit your new dream holiday home will always be the problem-even if Sir Richard Branson ever gets those Virgin moon flights up. The Social Shuttle visited a Russian Moon Shuttle positioned in Darling Harbour during the 2000 Sydney Olympics and we weren't impressed.

Apart from being greeted at the bottom of the stairs by Mikhail Gorbochev who has a bone mangling hand-shake, the Moon Shuttle is quite frightening. They look wonderfully shiny and slick from the outside but when you enter you are confronted by a sea of dangling wires, old batteries , weird instruments and contraptions bound up with gaffer tape.

                                                  do not shake hands with this man !

Why are we not surprised that Tom Cruise has a Moon plot and one is soon to be dedicated to
Michael Jackson ?.
You can also get a Moon citizenship and a passport but be warned-the The Lunar Embassy's Canadian franchisee, a fugitive wanted on fraud charges has just been arrested outside a Las Vegas casino.

More God awful talk!

If you are at a loose end this long weekend there's always the Festival of Dangerous Ideas at the Opera House to be opened by journalist and God hater Christopher Hitchens who will be in conversation with ABC Nightline host Tony Jones on the topic 'Religion Poisons Everything'.

Taking an opposing stance on Sunday is Catholic Archbishop Cardinal George Pell, the man who was nearly Pope last time around who argues 'Without God We Are Nothing' and Muslim leader Keysar Trad who argues that 'Polygamy and Other Islamic Values are Good for Australia'.

If you aren't slashing your wrists by this stage-wait, there's more. Aboriginal activist Gary Foley will argue that 'The Aboriginal Genocide will be complete' and Germaine Greer will be asking "do people really want Freedom ?".

Have a nice weekend.

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## there is a God after all....or did Krishna do it! Relief is in sight according to the British blogger Madame Arcati who reports the most unpopular TV series ever foisted upon the Australian viewing public will be no more.' Mumbai Calling' , is to be axed. Amen to that.

for those about to visit Nu Zulund...

If you haven't discovered the writer Duncan Fallowell then you are missing something important. His book about his travels in New Zealand, Going As Far As I Can is a must read if you are about to hit the snow-fields or anywhere in that amazingly beautiful country. NZ is every bit as sensational as seen in the Lord of the Rings trilogy which only showed a fraction of some of the glorious countryside. Much like Britain or Ireland but without the motorways.

Fallowell's book hit a few raw nerves in NZ itself but was generally viewed as one of the best travel books about any country...and anyway, we all know most Nu Zelunders are barking mad and talk funny but there must be a reason HRH The Queen owns extensive properties there.

Fallowell's wikopedia entry reports " Graham Greene did not like his first novel but thought it belonged to the 21st century. William Burroughs relished his books " . That's a bit like a recommendation from the Gods.

Now Britain's most infuriating blogger Madame Arcati brings news of Fallowell's new venture, a ghost book named The Visitor. She has a creepy video on her site, set in a rambling old house to introduce the novel and drum up interest.

One commenter on Aracti's site asks where it was filmed. The house looks similar to Sherston, the home of the late Lady Edith Foxwell which the Shuttle spent many a weekend at.

The strange figure who arises from the sofa at the end -believed to be Duncan Fallowell, reminds us of the greeting we always got from Lady Edith's butler-similarly relaxed and always delighted when guests arrived. Being in that he always phoned ahead to request they bring the odd dozen bottles of mixed spirits ( Edith's credit having been cut off at the local village vinter).

You will have to visit the Madame Arcati blog to see Fallowell's spooky video but here's another of his we like-talking about drugs at Oxford.




ps: Duncan Fallowell also wrote a biography of April Ashley, the former Liverpudlian sailor who became one of the world's most famous sex-changes . One of the Shuttle staff often visited April in her house in Hay-on-Wye and once accompanied her to the Berkley Square Ball in the days it was still smart-only to be featured the next day in a photo in the Daily Mail and a piece by the late diarist Nigel Dempster as "April Ashley's new Toyboy".

For some strange reason, Ashley's auto-biography recently had to be pulped over a misunderstanding with her publisher and Shuttle associate John Blake-described by the magazine Private Eye as the "distinguished London publisher". You can get other Blake book titles from his website which features exciting titles like "Katie and Peter - Too Much In Love by  Emily Herbert (yes, a tome about that mystery couple),, Jade - Fighting to the End by..err Jade Goody (I guess before the end came), and our favourite Global Warming and Other Bollocks

For more of Duncan Fallowell's great books, go to his website.

pps: thank you for the many emails pointing out the shocking spelling and grammar errors that appear on the Social Shuttle but we must point out that both Shuttlers suffer from slight dyslexia, are often hungover or just plain drunk when hitting the keyboard. Errors are eventually corrected when our charming assistant Sally arrives in the early afternoon. But feel free to mock the afflicted-we can take it !

opening Pandora's box

 

         Jonathon King & friend in one of his discreet publicity snaps

Britain's most irreverent blogger Madame Arcati who has a habit of getting up the nose of many a tabloid editor for her ability to scoop them, brings news about former pop identity Jonathon King's planned auto-biography.

65 year old King is a British singer, songwriter, TV personality,impresario and writer according to his wikipedia entry (did he write it himself ?)-but it's all true.  His first hit song when he was still a uni-student  "Everyone's Gone to the Moon", in 1965 sold 4 million copies around the world. No mean feat in the days when mass media didn't really exist. This was followed by some weird and wonderful show biz antics with King at times in fright wigs or adopting different personas to flog successful records (records-that's what they were called in those days kids)..who also discovered and produced the ginormous band Genesis , produced the Bay City Rollers and our personal favourite-The Piglets.

One older Shuttler worker here has admitted, somewhat reluctantly, to dancing joyfully to one of King's biggest hits Una Paloma Blanca in the 1980's in an Ibizia disco before it became the gay haven it is today and one could express such inhibitions watched only by puzzled local Spanish waiters.

The UK Independent's columnist Pandora ( days after Arcati broke the tale) has labeled King's book as  " his latest bid for attention". A somewhat unusual claim from a newspaper regarded as a more intellectual tabloid but which still carries tales of the earth shattering news of the marriage break-up of 2 people called Jordon and Peter Andre. No, we aren't to sure who Peter and Jordon are either but Britain is obsessed with them since the demise of reality star Jade Goody.

They seem a nice pair but what they actually do is a mystery although older Shuttlers may re-call there was a mildly successful singer by the name of Peter Andre in Sydney who left for the UK years ago. That's to the land where attention seeking has become an art form and Britain's media is only too happy to assist.

King ran foul of the law and was a guest at Her Majesty's Pleasure over accusations of underage sex (the law in the UK has since lowered the legal age to 16) but says on his website he has an appeal before the European Court which he is confident of winning after discovering proof he wasn't in the UK at the times the offenses are said to have happened.

King has probably confused many of Britain's sex obsessed tabloids. Rather than slink out of prison as expected, coat over head into a waiting car to speed off-he walked out broadly smiling , thumbs high in a victory stance. Such antics just puzzle the British media who demand everyone express permanent shame. Regular visitors to London will notice most pedestrians comply.

For Jonathon King's own view of his trial, a must see is his movie Vile Pervert where King plays all roles. It is quite hilarious.

## The Shuttle hopes King's book is as fascinating as 'Brando Unzipped', the biography of the late Marlon Brando by a long-time associate Darwin Porter (a relative of Brando's pal Tennessee Williams) which revealed tales of Brando's insatiable sexual appetite and his propensity to star-f**k every Hollywood identity from Marilyn Monroe , Tallulah Bankhead, Rock Hudson, Cary Grant and James Dean (who apparently liked his nipples twisted and ciggies stubbed out on his chest with Brando happy to oblige). One story told of Brando boasting about Marlene Deitrich's oral skills and how she would helpfully get down on her knees and scrub the kitchen floor afterwards ( well, she was a Virgo and that sounds about right).

Plus the news that far from being "working class" as Brando like to portray himself-he was from a wealthy middle-class family and was expelled from military school after organizing an orgy with fellow students.

   

            Madame Arcarti                                                               a youthful Marlon Brando

## Speaking of Tennessee Williams, the Shuttle attended the preview last night of Liv Ullman's STC production of "A Streetcar named Desire" and will post a longer review later-after we attend the official opening night on Saturday. Needless to say, Cate Blanchett is simply amazing as Blanche Du Bois which should please Cate's husband Andrew Upton who we encountered before the play looking very nervous and frantically texting on his mobile phone.

That was until Cate suffered an accident when a scene where Stanley throws a radio at Blanche. The prop grazed Cate as she fell on all fours. Audience members thought it was all part of the show but when Cate disappeared off stage, the stage manager cut short the performance. Cate's fine except for a small nick on the forehead and was back performing tonight-just one of the hitches that need to be ironed out before the gala premier later this week.